The Roller Coaster Continues...

One of my students just came by my house (around 6:30 pm...as I start typing this). Again, a bad thing about living where you teach--especially with some of your students literally close enough to steal their family's wireless Internet connection--is that they sometimes stop by at awkward or unwanted times. Nevertheless, it was a generally positive exchange.

The student is a genuinely interesting one. My understanding is that his parents are not from the U.S. (I believe they're Jamaican immigrants...first or second-generation). That makes him EXTREMELY rare in the school already as 99.9% of the kids there have been in the Delta, or at least Mississippi, for as far back as anyone in their family can remember. Nevertheless, like me without the Igbo accent of my parents, he has no semblance of a Jamaican accent. He speaks the same English in the same fashion of people who grew up around him in Belzoni, just as my accent is the same as people I grew up around in Trenton.

Last week I took three entire days out of my EACH of my classes just so my students could do make-up work in hopes of passing my class. I went in order from those who needed to pull their grades up the most to those who needed to do so the least and in my most troubling class--my seventh period Mississippi Studies class with 9th graders---he was second to be called up (the student before him has a zero average). This kid had an average of 4. His mouth dropped when he came up to my computer and looked at the screen where his missing assignments, behavior log, and average were shown. His (inappropriate) behavior log has several recent entries--probably more than any other student. Out of a five-day week, he'll be put out of class three days, won't come to school one day, and will manage to not do work the day he's not put out of class. After turning in about 40% of his make-up work I re-computed his grades and his average went up to...a 13. Great. Next year, same class.

Anyway, so THIS student lives around the corner from me and came by a moment ago. He seemed startled that I came to the door and didn't really know what to say besides, "Hey, Mr.Amutah!" I replied with a "hey" also and inquired as to how he's doing. He said he's been fine and talked about our Black History Month Program that was held today. He said that it went well. He also stated that yesterday he came by with Patrick (another student in my 7th period Mississippi Studies class) and that they were worried about me. I wanted to say, "Bullsh*t. You wanted to see if I was still alive or not so you could run and tell the other students that Mr.Amutah is on his sickbed/quitting/dead/going back to Africa (?) so you all can have a party and not repeat my course. Keep it real." But I didn't. I just let the positive exchange be a positive exchange. He asked if I'd be in school on Monday and I said yes. He kind of started walking away awkwardly (this kid is sooooo weird) and then I bid him a good weekend. He did the same to me.

After experiencing this and reading more of  for our EDSE 601 class with Dr.Mullins I feel like I've repaired some. Reading about students in East St.Louis or Washington, D.C. or even in Camden, NJ--45 minutes from where I grew up--is very sobering. The realities of what these children and teens deal with should not be dealt with by any and while I don't agree that the end, complete and all-encompassing problem is lack of government help, I definitely think that these people have been royally shafted by local, state, and federal governmental bodies and politicians and this has increased the difficulty of bettering their current situations. I have no idea what my students are dealing with at home, in their communities, with other students, with other teachers, or what have you. To expect them to perform at my standards immediately and consistently is not fair. I'm not saying that having a four in my class is at all excusable, but I am saying that context needs to be given to students' behaviors and formal assessments--whether made by myself or by the state's board of education--should not be the be-all-end-all measure of a student, let alone a human being.

Perhaps I'll take my mother's advice and go easier on them with the *difficulty* of the work (mind you, I'm adamant that my work is NOT hard! Overwhelmingly, the students just don't attempt to do it). Next week, I know that I will definitely give ALL of my students at least one graded assignment daily with an optional, extra credit homework assignment each night. With a 13 average and only one week left in this nine weeks, some students have to get on the grind FOR REAL. We shall see.

A while ago I think I said that what I think will end up pulling me through these two years is a love for my students. I really hope that this love can be sustained and that it's potent enough to do so because I can't have too many more weeks like this week. Too many other options....